This is a shitty translation to test things out, pls no bully but do point out mistakes because it might be filled with them.
The first box in the 11th page is an absolute disaster, I have no idea on what is the translation so I tried to put something """fitting""".

RAW: https://e-hentai.org/g/1355451/b37d63125f/

Well, the art is...not great and I don't see any glaring issues with the translation.

Base +16, Draw99Gray -17, Eric McSaltypenis +6, erana +7, RadiantLore-chan +7, robypoo +8, 01Anon -5

What are you talking about the art is amazing. 18master is one of my favorite artists and their hentai is just amazing. Have you seen their other works?

Base +3, Megaton +42, dekamaster2 -7, Dorseen +6, Draw99Gray +17, Eric McSaltypenis -6, erana -7, tkhang +27, incogna777 +6, LegoArielFanMaster +8, shinnt +17, 01Anon +5, Xiroam +10, and 1 more...

Already translated?, Wow That was fast.

Base +3, Dorseen +6, tkhang +27, RadiantLore-chan +7

The art of this isn't the best in the world.
It's pretty good, but still somewhat rough.
I like it to a degree.
That was a FAST translation, though.
Dear LORD...
I DO like the dialogue here.
Thanks, Dorseen!

Base +10, RadiantLore-chan +7, Dorseen +7, harghl +11, DarkMel +8