I hope you all love this one I worked really hard on this one to try and develop a story on how Chifuyu Orimura became a futa and the only one in the world to where she has to breed the one womb that will bring back Ichika Orimura that died or nearly died but got sucked into Chifuyu's cock and balls to save him and turn him into Super Sperm that will create a new body for him more like a super body that won't allow him to die now that we touched on that without giving to much away but I do plan on making more chapters when I have the time to do so.

I really don't want to give away to much but I will keep working on the story for the first chapter I think I have some areas to improve on but the problem is how to go about it.

so this will be about Hyper Pregnancy and Hyper Sperm also Giga Titties and Giga Ass I will be making more improvements as I go along in this fan made series I have created.

I will make more series like this all about Chifuyu Orimura and Ichika Orimura with different characters from others series like Naoto Shirogane for an example.

Ok i understand your thing, i think it's not bad, but:
-Animation is bad compared to standart nowadays.
-Too much unnecessary talking, try to write less and put more action.

Base +6

Way too much dialogue and of pretty poor quality at the beginning too with her just repeating "fuck" for like 5 pages, same goes for the part where she is sucking him into her cock, that needed like 3 pages max to convey that sequence. Next critique is the type setting, i'm sure you've read plenty of doujins too see good examples, so I'll just suggest to keep it fairly consistent with a tad bigger font; and if you are going to place the font on screen with not text box, use an outline, the boxes should be more transparent too. The concept is okay and the tags are something I would be into kink wise, but there is much room for improvement.

Photopedia is decent free online photoshop option to edit images in post, I hear gimp is good too, but I haven't used it. I work in Honey select 1 and am familiar with the process for HS2 as well.

Base +7, honey12345678910 +5

Thank you very much Stoned Scorer and Ultrakojima this is really great feed back I need so to much of diolauge need to reduce that okay animation is bad okay that one I may be able to work on a little better but not much when working in 3D it takes lots of time and effort and practice to make all the scenes so I will try and do more improvement on that thank goodness I'm remaking this all over again which is fine for me since I'm trying to build my credit up here now a little more action got it photopedia could be a good tool to use now that I looked it up. alright I will get to work on this now it will take me a few months maybe a year due to me having IRL job as well.

again thank you for the feedback.

Base +7, CakePlease +6