This is my first time typesetting a doujin so I apologize for any noob mistakes.

This took much longer than I anticipated (the entire day in fact) so I have new found respect for the people who translate and typeset the things we take for granted.

I used the Chinese raws and based the text off of LeeChamFun's translation.

I made some changes to the grammar and phrasing so they don't sound as broken. I can't say if this translation is correct but this is most likely Good Enough.

I also edited some pages to allow for bigger speech boxes so I could use larger font.

I started inserting the camera sound but that was taking too much time so I stopped. Just know that if you see the same symbol again and again then it's most likely the sound of the camera taking a picture (or wet kissing sound).

Hope you enjoy this.

The "translation" has a lot of problems, as someone already pointed out in 4chan, it removes all the subtleties in the dialogues which can be misleading. This is like Matome Ban all over again. You shouldn't have done this, I hope you didn't kill any hope of this receiving a translation that it deserves. I guess it will be a few years before this shitty translation gets fixed. What hurts is the effort put in here, it's so pitiful. This version is incomplete, it's a fucking draft by Jin, end of. Honestly, I don't think this draft deserves to even be typesetted considering it's incomplete. The same good be said for Matome Ban, even to this day, people are not aware that it has a second and more complete version (Check my scans, that is the second version. It has more shadows and backgrounds.) Apparently there are a few new speech bubbles (Probably moans) but I can't confirm this.. Perhaps someone was waiting to commission a translation of this when the complete edition comes out. What's the point of translating if you only want it to be good enough. I'm a translator, I make mistakes (even more back then) and I have a lot of areas to improve but I always try my best to translate Japanese (even if my best isn't always good enough). This kind of works devalues proper translations. If a rewrite or a Laruffi interpretation of a doujin is good enough to read, does it mean it's a translation? I don't think so.

I admire your effort but It only makes me mad seeing someone like you puts so much effort in typesetting a bad translation to a incomplete version of the doujin while Jin fucks around and does not put any effort in completing his works. His fans care so much yet it seems he doesn't care at all. Maybe that's why he has no way of interacting with fans like a Twitter (The Jin impostor in Twitter is a piece of shit) because he doesn't care about his fans, he just want to milk them of their hard earned money.

Guys, this is a draft version, Jin said it himself that a more complete version will be released in the future, probably as part of the second compilation. Also, Up7 didn't translate this, only cleaned up LCF's script as much as he could. But why try and fixed something when it's already flawed in the first place? He made it look like the original translation was any good. Look, I think it's good enough, it gives you an idea of what is being said, etc and at least there are no badly translated sentences like the infamous "50 KG" line from the first attempt at translating Matome Ban as far as I can see. But I haven't really compared them side by side so there might be errors. It just not as accurate or precise as it could be. Many people will be contented with this. Considering Jin's popularity, it's unbelievable some of his work are translated or scanned for years.

Also, I don't think I verbally abused this guy. I wasn't that harsh. I didn't slander this guy at all. I didn't criticised his typesetting. You guys are overreacting. Yes, keep downvoting me. You guys love that after all. You don't know how hard it is to translate properly and it pisses me off how people don't value it enough. I think I might be overthinking this, this is just hentai after all, as long as it's readable and and seems to fit the scenes, it's good enough. I try doing that when I continue translating the novel (Just joking!).

@Calicko
Yes it is, it uses scans from first version rather than the second version.
@A0_
You are free to proofread my work and send me any changes you have. Unlike majority of translators, I don't delete the. PSDs of all my releases so I can change anything anytime.
@zephyr_
FYI, I'm not a commission only translator.

Last edited on 18 December 2017, 18:06.

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Tohsaka pleasures old men!

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RAW https://e-hentai.org/g/1103382/36891bfe7e/
alt ENG TL by [LCFC2E] https://e-hentai.org/g/1155313/8dc65fa49a/

Base +53, SunsetChaos +5, Megaton +36, Bane13 +42, Ferrate +7, S0B +13, George642 +9, jfragrettel +8, TheOldDeus +7, baneonplane +7

@shakuganaexa Look, I know where you're coming from, and I understand the negative impact that this could have on the project; however, you could stand to be a little nicer on the matter. I don't think he meant any intentional harm to the project by uploading this, he just wanted to try and contribute. You on the other hand, slander him via disgracing his work, and then complain saying "I hope you didn't kill any hope of this receiving a translation that it deserves." That's just petty. You're a perfectly capable human being with clearly the right skill set to translate doujinshi from what I have seen from your contributions; if you're so concerned, you could take up the project when it's ready for translation. This isn't criticism, this is straight up verbal abuse. Either learn to be a civil human being about it without the foul mouth, or you're lesser than the person that you slighted. You're better than this.

Base +7, john pantau +6, Colliterz +6, Ferrate +7, kal3 +7, NineTails11 +5, S-pan +9, yeit +6, Carreir002 -6, tremain +7, gamaroguar +6, Status_Effect -6, Biladsan +16, and 58 more...

@shakuganaexa So the coloured Eng scanlation of Matome Ban is still incomplete?

Base +6, jfragrettel +8, TheOldDeus +7

Thank you man! :)

Base +7, Up7 +7, seanpatt +5, jfragrettel +8, TheOldDeus +7, MelmothTheWanderer +33

The translation is terrible, the font may no longer hurt my eyes and my brain is no longer dying but its now confused as hell...

Base +11, john pantau -6, jfragrettel +8, Sergeant Horny +6, TheOldDeus +7, baneonplane -7

@shakuganaexa
I agree with seibaru here. What you did is uncalled for, while it's true that the translation needs work, attacking someone in that kind of way is simply just low man.

Anyways, thanks for a bit better translation and a more readable font Up7

Base +6, Status_Effect -6, Colliterz +6, zi0matrlx +7, Syokool +8, Secundus -7, Capi duffman +15, DarkShatter -6, Ponisito +6, SavageBlowJob +6, granbluediego +2, jfragrettel +8, Mastemo +6, and 3 more...

still need more work in translating the right words, also maybe just use the original japanese word for the words that you think dont need to translate such as gasping, breathing sound instead of chinese words since i think most people get used to japanese word than chinese word in here. I have nothing against chinese, so please dont bash me for choosing japanese word over chinese word m(_ _)m

pverall quite a good job on translating, keep up the good work

also @shakuganaexa
agree with the other, WTH with you bashing ppl like that, and who said this is draft work anyway?? if you dont like his work go talk to him directly...actually, no you dont even have the right for it, none of us did, since almost all of us read it FREE from this website....since we got this for FREE and the guy translate this for FREE as well you dont have the right to bash people like that. You got something for FREE and instead of talking nicely, you complain and nagging bashing people like this, to make it worse this you called DRAFT?? what does your eyes make of cotton or something? we dont need your kind here, GTFO

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Don't you guys hate it when you come to fap and you end up reading people arguing instead? Let's just put things into perspective here: this site is about free hentai. We're not building a spacecraft here where everything is a matter of life and death. This ain't a concentration camp and we're not in the army. No need to berate each other like that. Sure, constructive criticism is cool, but I don't like it when it's just all negative.

Base +2, Buktar +8, EdwardGurren +6, saegull123 -15, Zeratul656 -7, Up7 +7, ss567 +6, DarkShatter -6, Agmastiftva +8, JukanX -16, Colliterz +7, viseurahh +6, yukkurikeeper +6, and 8 more...

I'm more concerned with the fact there is apparently another version of Matome Ban that we seemed not to have seen yet. Whatever we want to say about the translations of it, I think we can agree that another version of it with more content or a better version of the content we already have would be lovely to see even untranslated.

Base +4, Up7 +7, Themgs +4, DarkShatter +6, Scorps283 +4, jfragrettel +8, TheOldDeus +7

@shakuganaexa Come back and criticize translations when you actually proofread your own work ok? Your releases are very hard to read.

EDIT:

Let me spell it out for you. PROOFREAD YOUR OWN GODDAMN WORK OR ASK SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO.
YOU CANNOT DEFLECT CRITICISM BY SAYING "you're free to proofread my work"

Your work is full of shitty translations and the fact that you want to say stuff like "I guess it will be a few years before this shitty translation gets fixed"
is frankly disgusting.

"Also, I don't think I verbally abused this guy. I wasn't that harsh."
Yeah, calling his work shitty without any example and then saying:
"I hope you didn't kill any hope of this receiving a translation that it deserves."

You're not just harsh, you're arrogant.

DO THE GODDAMN TRANSLATION YOURSELF IF YOU THINK IT'S BEEN "killed."

"What hurts is the effort put in here, it's so pitiful."
No, what hurts here is your inability to have any self-awareness.

I've tried to be nice about this, but you clearly aren't listening.

Last edited on 20 December 2017, 02:04.

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when commission translators complain about free translations, but will never do anything about it because they're only in it for the money

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lmao people mad about mtsp again

edit:
wow this place had a lot shakuganexa dick rider
remember when he drops mtsp novel translation? and crying like a bitch in his blog while blaming it on people who criticise grammatical writing like himself on this case.

Last edited on 19 December 2017, 20:35.

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Awesome, thanks a lot for all the effort and sharing :)

Please don't tag this with the poor grammar tag, that tag requires you to write up and post in the comment section a checklist detailing the specific grammatical and spelling errors. Don't tag it unless you're willing to take on that responsibility, you're just going to hurt your tagging accuracy and that does have consequences.

Base +38, Colliterz +7, DarkShatter +6, himalllloi -6, jfragrettel +8, Sergeant Horny -6, TheOldDeus -7, BaperNu +9, baneonplane +7

strawmanning xd

Base +3, jfragrettel +8, TheOldDeus +7

tbh I don't really read the text too closely to find grammer errors. I usually just read to get the gist of what going on so any English text is good enough for me. I am not reading this for a English thesis paper...

Anyway, thanks for the typesetting. I thought it was readable and fine.

Base +6, Up7 +7, DarkShatter -6, LillySatou -6, AkadShadoWalker +6, Kuro Yuuki -6, Eldiran +6, jfragrettel +8, jokeroi +2, Sergeant Horny -6, TheOldDeus +7, baneonplane +7

@shakuganaexa

Presumably you're commissioning a translation, right?

Right?

Base +16, AloofSloth +8, jfragrettel +8, Sergeant Horny -6, TheOldDeus +7, baneonplane +7

Good job editing, Up7.

Well, sometimes, I really don't understand the people nowadays.
No one translate, complain.
People asks money to translate with quality, complain.
People translate for free without quality, also complain.

This is fapping material, dude, not English thesis, you just need to know the gist of story & fap.

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i wonder if there should be an anal tag on this just bcz of the comments.

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I feel like Jin let this one drag on a bit. It carries the story of the rest of the series and Rin is beautiful naked and being pleasured as usual, but, this doesn't carry the same excitement as the others. I do love how erotically Rin is drawn in the last half and how the size difference between his body and hers becomes so apparent in the scenes with him on top of her. Most don't like seeing bigger guys in these doujin but I think that there is something very sexy about Rin being rutted and pinned down by such a large man. Her disgust, reluctant arousal, and helplessness make it simply delicious.

While this translator was lazy by their own admission and did not bother to translate all of the little repetitive kissing and camera flash noises, this amateur translation still has a great deal of merit. This translation is the most organic and most easily relatable to an American audience, using colloquialisms and speech patterns that Americans Americans would be familiar with, while also presenting a translation that was still clear enough to mostly understand the story.

More accurate and detailed translation here.
https://e-hentai.org/g/1324751/bd99aaf7e1/

Inferior scan and horrible translation in broken English here.
https://e-hentai.org/g/1155313/8dc65fa49a/

Art 7. Plot 4. Translation 5. True to character 5. All out of 10.

Last edited on 06 December 2018, 21:53.

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