I've found it, the porn parody that would make me say "I wish i was Tom Nook".

Base +24, firestorm252 +6, AyeSpy +7, oneiwonder +7, BL_TS +6, Lostalgia +9, randomletterjumble +11, lumienze +1, worstsinner +6, Bagger Vance +6, Mechicandogtaquero +5, Azazels_Angel +3, Lafey -7

I feel like this is gonna end in one of them being killed.

Base +6, oneiwonder +7, Your Brother +6, Lostalgia +9, commie +6, jorm55 +6, Mechicandogtaquero +5

@justlookingforporn i hope not... but pg 8 is telling me otherwise ><

Base +8, oneiwonder +7, Lostalgia +9, commie +6, Mechicandogtaquero +5

You had my curiosity, now you have my attention!

Base +8, BL_TS +6, Lostalgia +9, Nintyfresh +8

Page 8: ....Why did Megalovania start playing...? Oh no...

Base +12

"She never wouldn't do that."

I think you mean:
"She would never do that."

unless you mean she's so batshit crazy that she would always do that (the double negative 'never wouldn't = always would').

Base +3, commie +6, Lady-Akane +5, Temperature Critical +26

Engrish is best!

Base +7, Lafey +7