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English is not my first language, so if you see any error in any text please tell me how to write it correctly so I can fix it, thanks.

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just OOC trash without any knowlege

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Page 5 panel 2
Instead of "There is" you should use "Is there" and a ? at the end.

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@GreenDragon24 what did you expect, the portion of the Naruto fandom that the does r34 is STILL salty their particular ships didn't happen so the make this anti naruhina and anti Sasusaku NTR bullshit just look a Every Karakashi Yuhei doujin, all the make is that Narusaku cumdump shit, Eve when ue makes one with Hinata he always shoehorns Narusaku into it.

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@GreenDragon24 At least it's not Raikage again.

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@dragonfly82 you just had to bring up Raikage do you? its amazing how you and people like you hate him, but you just got bring him up some how.

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^ Reason being, because of just how much fucking blacked dumpster hentai there is with the Raikage cucking Naruto by fucking Hinata, or Hinata being a trashy sizequeen. Nothing about it is appealing, desirable, or even logically sound, because:
1) Hinata has the Byakugan, aka, the Pervert Eyes that allow you to see through walls and clothing, to the point where you can see a person's chakra network. You mean to tell me Hinata never once checked how much heat her crush was packing, and even if he didn't, she would actually care?
2) Hinata was kidnapped by the same fucking village the Raikage is in charged of back before she started attending the academy. I would think that would scar her from any black people from that village in particular.
3) Naruto is quite literally the world's strongest ninja. If chakra has a connection to dick size (as it does for breast size, as seen with Tsunade and Hinata), then Naruto has a fucking tree in his pants. Sizequeen Hinata would have no reason to cheat on Naruto, especially when the guy can spawn thousands of himself.

TL;DR: RaikagexHinata is probably the worst pairing the fandom has ever shat out of Pandora's Box, and when I type in Naruto's name in R34, I don't want to be greeted with blacked content.

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cry more whiners

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As English isn't your first language, I'd say you got the gist of the grammar and meanings out well enough, as I understand that you'd need more time to perfect and edit the dialogue on each page. The art is unique and bit appealing as it holds a distinct Western-style influence while trying to be sort-of anime-like. However, this also indicates that it requires color to be more palatable and falls further under the harsh rule of art; the subjectivity of viewers will determine how they respond to your work by appearance alone.

As for the 'plot', it's rather simple: Mothers doing sexual favors to the teacher for their children's sake. Not bad, but nothing out of this world either, sorry to say. I will say that it's nice that Konahamaru is the teacher. While Shino would also be a unique choice, Konahamaru fits better and he rarely is utilized as someone the Naruto women would cheat with.

Overall, not bad but not great either. Very much average when it comes to hentai, but points for being a bit rare plot-wise within the Naruto hentai sphere.

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