RAW: https://e-hentai.org/s/4d746beaad/842717-96

Dude that comm'd this should ask for his money back, he got scammed.

1.

TL: Could it be that…
RAW: あれもあれもあれもあれもあれもあれも！
Author’s intent: Just saying “and them and them and them…” ad nauseum. I get that it’s boring and you wanna find a way to spice it up, but you can’t, especially not with something nowhere close to the original text.

TL: Are having sex tonight!?
RAW: 今晩せっくすするんだ．．．！
Author’s intent: No ?. She’s not asking, she’s just saying it. Again, you can’t make shit up.

2.

TL: Even on campus, free condoms were handed out, but they soon ran out, didn’t they?
RAW: オリンピックでも１５万個とかすぐに足りなくなったんでしょ？
Author’s intent: She says the Olympics, not campus, which ties into the rest of her tirade (which you also got completely wrong).

TL: At least 10,000 condoms were handed out in just a few days.
RAW: つまりこれは最低でも数日間で１５万回以上は１５万まんこしたってことでしょ？
Author’s intent: 15万 is 150,000. “That’s to say, even at a minimum, during those few days, 150,000 pussies were fucked more than 150,000 times.”

TL: So that means that over the course of at least a few days, all those people had that much sex, right?
RAW: 生でした人もいるだろうからもっともっとまんこまんこしてるってことでしょ？
Author’s intent: There were probably even people doing it raw too, right? That means there was even more pussy had than that, right!?

TL: Sex…I-I meant to say I’m home!
RAW: せっくすー （ただいまーの発音で）
Author’s intent: She just says sex with the intonation of her saying tadaima. All that extra shit you just made up.

TL: Erm, okay…
RAW:．．．懐かしいね
Author’s intent: Made up again.

TL:I just had such a long day, I’m just feeling a little…
RAW: ．．．せ ．．．せせくすぃーひいいいいむ．．．？
Author’s intent: made up

3.
TL: Oh, I noticed something else too…
RAW: あぁ．．．ついでだからいうけど．．．
Author’s intent: “Ah, I’ll tell you this too, but…”, didn’t say noticed, he’s basically just like oh yeah btw.

5.

TL: Right!?
RAW: は？
Author’s intent: “Huh?”, he’s expressingly confusing instead of agreeing.

TL: Are you sure about this, Hina?
RAW: そ そういうもんなのか？
Author’s intent: “I-Is that right…?”, he’s 100% not asking her if she’s okay with this, especially since she’s the one trying to goad HIM into doing this. Bro this makes literally no sense.

TL: N/A
RAW: やっぱでかいなー
Author’s intent: “I knew they were big…”, big booba

Last edited on 22 March 2023, 11:28.

Base +18, cybeast93 +22, hobohobo +33, Analfe Tish +9, bigscuba +8, opodin +7, wocle +8, LordBlubberNuggets +6, funk_u_up +13, Jouven +8, Anvill -6, Orbz +7, MistaLOD +7, and 4 more...

I've always wondered, why is there no big siste / little sister tag?

Base +6

Dude, your typesetting is also a complete fucking mess. Inconsistent line spacing, font sizes are all over the place, centering and text aligning are completely off, etc. You're actually charging for this shit? If you were doing this on your own volition I wouldn't even be this annoyed, but you're actually scamming people here with absolute dogshit translations AND editing.

Base +7, funk_u_up +13, nepeta_nihonjin +6

Questionable translation aside, such a cute dorky sister with nice tits. thisismyfetish.gif

Base +10, Aelth +7

@Mr_Person
I totally get your point. But the person who asked for it gave me a specific script to rewrite it in the story, they said they liked the art and wanted to alter the story a little bit to their liking i asume to use as fap material. I forgot to mention it's a rewrite and not the original translation; that's my fault for causing you to misunderstand.

@hamuxhamuxhamu
I did it for someone as favor, and it was for free; I wasn't really checking the structure of the typing because I couldn't be bothered to waste more of my time. But I totally understand where you're anger is coming from.

Base +1, Spengbab -6, civiulas +6, funk_u_up -13, Paul Funion +6, SluttyNora +4, burntphoenix +6, EvilSanta -6

Rewrites are such cringe.

Base +6, LordBlubberNuggets +6, Spengbab +6, thincrisp +5, Beane +7, Spooky Ghost Butts +8, funk_u_up +13, MistaLOD +7

Please tag rewrites as "Rewrite", not "Translated."

Base +22, thincrisp +5, Spooky Ghost Butts +8, funk_u_up +13, MistaLOD +7

@KeizerD

Did he also tell you to leave out all the text not in boxes?

I 100% don’t believe you since some of the stuff that’s supposedly “rewritten” is so inane and unimportant to the story that “rewriting” it changes the story in no way shape or form, and plus the fact that your other English gallery is just as bad (in new and exciting ways) as this one, but beholding to our benevolent and almighty staff on this site, if the uploader says it’s a rewrite, it’s a rewrite.

Base +18, funk_u_up +13, SluttyNora -4, burntphoenix -6