Made with Sai (still learning how to use it) from my furafinity page http://www.furaffinity.net/user/batboyexe/

little comic I made, not much...well there's much...you might need to read the bios on my FA and DA pages.

Was this done in MS Paint!?

Base +8, Batboyexe +9, NFK +12, xxard +8, anonym654554 -8, TheTitto +8, flamedance58 +10

Ow, my eyes

Base +4, NFK +12, xxard +8, TheTitto +8

It's like reading Sonichu but it gets to the graphic, poorly drawn sex almost instantly! So take that away from this, at least you're doing better than Christian Weston Chandler. Try reading these guides on the human form and facial structure to improve the posture and anatomy of your characters; http://coelasquid.deviantart.com/art/Abdomination-How-to-draw-beef-132538271 for male forms and http://coelasquid.deviantart.com/art/How-to-draw-all-sorts-of-crap-104342407 for everything else. Further pieces of advice I can give is to vary your scenery within a panel more as well as on a page - experiment with using perspective and "camera" angles to convey mood or movement (for example on page 12 you could show their destination without detracting from the dialogue too much to convey their movement better, or show a different angle of them showing their legs in a very stationary pose to clarify whether or not they are moving at all!) The mention of dialogue leads me onto the largest criticism I can give you, which is your text - not only is it handwritten in very small print but it is also an incredibly faint grey in tone, making it nigh-on impossible to read. This suggests you're drawing the speech bubble first and placing text second - try doing it the other way round; and don't be afraid to obscure characters or other objects - you have infinite panels (almost) to show their speaking or to show that object. When using the structural conventions of the illustrations in graphic novels (speech as part of the scene, panels, the "cut-off" between pages) you need to have more variety, and to try to use everything at your disposal - varying panel size to convey pace or to place dramatic emphasis on an object or event, varying the amount of dialogue in a given panel to establish the tone of a scene and manipulating the relationship between the last panel of a page and the amount of time that the reader therefore expects to have passed. Finally, on the narrative side of things, your major faux pas is putting a significant burden on the reader to seek out additional media regarding characterisation and setting. A character is far easier to engage with and to understand if it is conveyed in action and interaction with other characters - if your way of establishing character is having another character simply describing them without any reason or juxtaposition with normal behaviour or previous characters, or having a bio describing them, not only are you ruining the flow of the narrative but you also create a very flat character with very little room for meaningful character development or differing interpretations by your readers. A character needs to be organic (not in the sense of being a molecular superstructure/molecule in it's own right that is comprised of a carbon backbone) to be interesting and appealing for your readers to interact with them and the narrative - for it is the readers who really decide who the characters are, what is happening on a grander scale and who the protagonist and antagonist(s) are, and if they can't do that they might as well just read porn... ah. I'm feeling really good about that 9k right now. Hopefully you take something away from this 4 am ramble, and all the best, you crazy diamond.

Base +4, anonym654554 +8, animedeath13 +9, TheTitto +8, flamedance58 +10, Batboyexe +9