Original by Gamute de kote
Artist: Ohmi Takeshi

Translation by farfallavendetta

If you want to buy the original untranslated doujin:
http://www.toranoana.jp/mailorder/article/04/0030/25/99/040030259995.html
https://www.melonbooks.co.jp/detail/detail.php?product_id=110101&adult_view=1

I do not own this doujinshi copyright belongs to the creators!

If there is any mistake in the translated text dont hesitate to tell me.

Criticism is welcome.

Happy Fapping

Rider never fails to give me a boner....moar pls

Base +7, silentrunner +7, ilovethishit +5, galeon +6, LaviRoux +6, Dima979 +2, rockarolla +6, horahorahorahora +6

My dick and my hearth are happy

Base +6, silentrunner +7, ilovethishit +5, LaviRoux +6, Doutey +8, Dima979 +2

Rider is best girl in FSN but her combat ability is low... Can't do much on Saber or other...

Base +7, silentrunner +7, IMNC -6, Jadia +7, pnx073 -7, Granten +7

Alright, we criticism now.

1. Leading spaces can screw with center align.

2. Use punctuation. English sentences end in punctuation. It doesn't matter if the Japanese doesn't use punctuation because you're translating into English.

3. Dialogue text should NEVER EVER touch a bubble. NEVER.

4. Avoid punctuation on its own line unless absolutely necessary.

5. Don't screw with font leading, just set it at default. If you didn't mess with font leading, then your Wild Words font is fucked and you should find a non-fucked one. Look up CC Wild Words to be precise.

6. Learn English grammar. Or just English in general.

Page 3: "Senpai I am concerned" - commas to separate names when addressing people
Page 3: "altough"
Page 4: "Hmm I see" - comma
Page 4: "You are taking care of Shiro and Saber the whole time and never think about you" - reflexive suffix -self the second time you use a pronoun
Page 4: "u" - no
Page 4: "even though u was sick" - agreement
Page 4: "u" - no
Page 4: "aby"
Page 4: "I'm just kidding Sakura" - commas to separate names when addressing people
Page 4: "If it's/alri-/ght" - improper hyphenation

Base +13, vgndtt +7, m0m0d0a +7, Vtechyo +6, magico alverman +7, IMNC +6, pibeska +5, yetsun +6, chibidw +6, doobik +7, faytT +8, Rokehe +12, moist367 +6, and 45 more...

>Criticism is welcome.

It's not ok to abreviate "you" as "u" in print. Even for porn it's jarringly informal.

Base +11, Beane +7, spikex99 +3, ilovethishit +5, elementalanubis +6, Tinithraviel +7, bobneil +6, warellis +5, Red of EHCOVE +50, kikimaru024 +12, LaviRoux +6, HAz4rd +6, kageganon +6, and 8 more...

Thank you ill keep that in mind

Base +5, chibidw +6, ilovethishit +5, Red of EHCOVE +50, NippleFire +10

The poor grammar wasn't getting in the way of the actual story for me up until the last two pages.

Base +5, LaviRoux +6, rockarolla +6, warellis +7, BobDringus +6

Why are you so hot RIDER !!!

Base +6

page:18 oh man that's so hot >//<

Base +7, Gigano_Reis +6

Wait, am confuz'd.

Is the kid Shirou or his name just the same? Was it written differently in the raw from how Emiya's name is written?

Anyhow, cute and sexy.

Base +6, rockarolla +6

Thanks to Hentai Rider is perhaps my favorite female character in the Fate/Stay Night universe.

Funny how things work out.

Base +6, Budda001 +6, Hyoros -15, MercuryLamp +9

While I do enjoy this hentai, the grammar and such is distracting. It makes me hear those words in an actual dialogue, and the Engrish is throwing me off my boner.

Base +7, Red of EHCOVE +50, shrurur +6, kageganon +6, BakaStratos +6

Aside from the constructive criticism that's already been done, I gotta say thanks for this and great choice.

Figures that she'd keep it with him at the end. The guy was pretty much Shirou to begin with, just minus a few years and, you know, the magic bit

Base +5

i don't think this should have a milf tag. Maybe we could make some "mature lady" tag or something (my fetish).

Base +4

Big fan of "my lust isn't hasty" and then two panels later she's all over him.

Base +9

who knew rider is a pedofile

Base +8

Some grammar/spelling issues:

[p4]
"think about you" -> "think about yourself"
"you where" -> "you were"
"u was" -> "you were"
"u werent aby" -> "you weren't able"

[p5]
"wont [...] isnt" -> "won't [...] isn't"

[p6]
"antigues" -> "antiques"
"isnt" -> "isn't"

[p7]
"courves" -> "curves"

[p8]
"cant" -> "can't"
"dont" -> "don't"
"dont" -> "don't"

[p11]
"used to get" -> "used to getting"
"Im friendly to woman" -> "I'm friendly to women" (or "a woman"?)

[p13]
"infront" -> "in front"

[p15]
"dont" -> "don't"

[p16]
"Why do you take it off!?" -> "Why are you taking it off?!"

[p17]
"altough" -> "although"
"exitement" -> "excitement"

[p19]
"thought he is weak" -> "thought he was weak"
"resisted to my" -> "resisted my"

[p25]
"a virgin which" -> "a virgin who"

[p29]
"musn't" -> "mustn't"

[p30]
"wan't" -> "want"
"wan't" -> "want"

[p41]
"I've haven't" -> "I haven't"
"wron" -> "wrong"

Base +27, Glovelove. +23